


What I See (Is You)

by fernweh (lumenera)



Category: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Book 2: Crooked Kingdom Spoilers, Canon Trauma, F/M, Mirror of Erised, all other characters are just mentioned
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-23
Updated: 2020-05-23
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:08:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24201823
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lumenera/pseuds/fernweh
Summary: The empty Slytherin Common room meant no one would question his disappearance in the middle of the night. Kaz knew the patrols' routes by heart now, and he easily maneuvered past them, slipping into what he was pretty sure was an empty classroom. He wasn't sure where he was going, but anywhere would be better than his silent dorm room. He was about to leave when something caught his eye.Kaz takes a midnight stroll and finds a mirror with an image he can't ignore.
Relationships: Kaz Brekker/Inej Ghafa
Kudos: 52





	What I See (Is You)

It was nights like these, when Kaz couldn't sleep. The tenseness of being on edge, always being watchful kept him up into the late hours of the night. Six years at Hogwarts had passed by in a flash, and now, he was on his seventh year. All his dormmates slept soundly. He couldn't understand how they could be so at ease, but he knew at the same time, he would never stop looking over his shoulder, no matter how old he was or how safe he felt. It was what set him apart from everyone else. He reached for his cane, careful not to make a sound as he closed the door behind him.

The empty Slytherin Common room meant no one would question his disappearance in the middle of the night. The fireplace crackled merrily, the only sign of movement he could see. Still his eyes swept over the room twice, just to make sure. He closed the portrait door quietly behind him. Kaz knew the patrols' routes by heart now, and he easily maneuvered past them, slipping into what he was pretty sure was an empty classroom. He wasn't sure where he was going, but anywhere would be better than his silent, suffocating, dorm room. He was about to leave when something caught his eye.

A mirror sat in the center of the room, and by the tracks of dust on the floor, he could tell it had been moved there pretty recently. Kaz moved towards it, curious. He read the letters embossed on the top of the frame: _The Mirror of Erised._ His brow furrowed as he tried to hazard a guess as to what made the mirror so special. He reached a gloved hand out to touch the surface, and the reflection staring back at him changed.

His breath caught.

His reflection smiled back at him. And next to his reflection stood Inej, beaming wider then he'd ever seen her. Her hair tumbled loosely around her shoulders instead of in her customary braid, her brown eyes gleaming with happiness. His eyes swept over the image, taking it in, and his heart almost stopped when he saw it. Two hands entwined by their sides. No black gloves. No flinching, just skin on skin contact.

Kaz couldn't remember the last time he'd willingly touched someone, even with gloves. A shiver ran down his spine, and he shuddered, his mind throwing him back to the water and the bloated, decaying bodies. In the back of his mind, he knew that he was hallucinating, the trauma resurfacing, but at the same time, he couldn't ignore the phantom touches from dead flesh on his skin. _It's not real, it's not real_. _Get a grip, Kaz_.

And in the background--another stab to the heart--"Jordie?" Kaz whispered, almost dropping his cane.

His older brother stared down at him, smiling just like Inej, so lifelike. He looked _happy_. Kaz closed his eyes. The last time he'd seen his brother, he'd been floating right side down in the canal. Dead. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn't get that image to leave his mind. This Jordie looked much older, no longer the 13 year old boy he once knew. He would've been, what, 21? Kaz inhaled sharply. Behind Jordie, stood their parents, each with a hand on Jordie's shoulders, smiling proudly at him. He couldn't tear his eyes away from the mirror, no matter how hard he tried. He watched as the Kaz in the mirror ran a hand through Inej's hair, tucking it behind one of her ears. He looked at her like there was nothing else in the world that mattered more than the moment the two shared.

Then, he heard footsteps, and as fast as he could, hid himself in the shadows of the classroom. The image in the mirror disappeared in time for two adults to stride in. The lighting of the room hid their faces, but then he heard Professor Haskell's low rasp. "This is it?"

"Yes," said the women, a voice that ticked the back depth of his memory. "This is the Mirror of Erised. It will show you your greatest desire."

"Thank you, Tante Heleen. This will be most useful indeed."

Kaz held his breath. _That_ was what the image was? He didn't dare move a muscle as Professor Haskell peered at his reflection in the mirror, the women standing smugly next to him. He couldn't see what was in the mirror, but Professor Haskell and the women soon left, apparently satisfied with what they saw. Kaz moved out of the shadows, leaning on his cane for support.

What did Kaz want, more than anything else in the world? He knew the answer to that in an instant. Vengeance on Pekka Rollins. Financial stability of having thousands of Galleons in the bank. He'd never have to worry again. Jordie's head in his voice, silenced forever, the one that still haunted him sometimes. The mirror had to be wrong. There was just no other explanation for it, because why else would he envision Inej Ghefa? Maybe the magic that made it was faulty. He'd heard about plenty of magical objects gone wrong.

He stepped forward into the mirror's view, and his reflection appeared again, still holding hands with Inej. She threw her head back in laughter, and Mirror-Kaz laughed along with her. Kaz could almost hear it in his head, like the giddy and wild, like she didn't have another care in the world, a laugh he'd only heard a few times. Jordie and his parents looked on fondly in the background.

He tore his eyes from the image, refusing to look at it a moment longer. Carefully, he made his way back to the Slytherin common room, whispering the password to let himself in. He slipped into his room and closed the door behind him, laying down on his bed and closing his eyes, unable to get what he saw out of his mind.

Is that what he wanted? A normal life? A family that loved him, a family that was still alive? Inej at his side?

Sleep did not take him. Answers did not find him.

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by a tumblr post I saw on Pinterest on what Kaz would see in the Mirror.  
> As always, thank you for reading!  
> 
> 
> [tumblr](https://lumenera.tumblr.com)


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